


And I'm Terrified But I Can't Resist

by EternallyEC



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, idiots to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:15:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24141913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EternallyEC/pseuds/EternallyEC
Summary: Based on the following prompt from the Jori Discord: "Jade throws snowballs at Tori's window, not realizing it's open."
Relationships: Tori Vega/Jade West
Comments: 10
Kudos: 149





	And I'm Terrified But I Can't Resist

**Author's Note:**

> Hey all! This started off as a ficlet but quickly grew longer so I decided to post it as a one shot. There may be more to come, as I found two more prompts that could work as a sequel, but for right now, it's a standalone. 
> 
> The title is from Finally // Beautiful Stranger by Halsey which is actually a pretty fitting vibe as I realized after playing it while looking for a title. 
> 
> Enjoy!

"Tori!" Jade hissed, rolling up another snowball in her gloved hands. When there was still no sign that Tori had heard her, she took careful aim and lobbed the snowball, already balling up a second and repeating the action.

Just as she was rolling up the third, the light went on, and she dropped the partially formed ball, dusting her gloves off as a smirk spread over her face. 

"Jade!" Tori's voice hissed, and the smirk dropped when she heard how pissed she sounded. "What the hell are you doing?" 

"Trying to get your attention since you won't answer your phone," Jade snapped, taking a step back and trying to see more than her dark silhouette leaning out of the window. 

"Thanks, Jade. Now my floor is covered in snow!" 

"What?" she blinked, her face scrunching up in genuine surprise. "You were sleeping with your window open?! What the hell, Vega, it's below freezing!" 

"That's not the point!" Tori huffed. "What do you want, Jade?" 

"Just to talk, Tori. Please." Her voice was soft, almost pleading as she shoved her hands into her pockets and angled her head, just able to make out her figure. 

Ever since they'd moved to New York for college, Jade and Tori had become almost inseparable. Not even Jade had been able to keep up the act when Tori was the only person she knew in a city full of strangers and frankly, she'd found it freeing to be able to just let everything go and let herself *be* with Tori the way she'd always wanted. 

She still didn't know where it'd gone wrong. 

Sure, Tori had walked in on her with a girl in their shared apartment, but it wasn't the first time. Okay, so maybe it was the first time Tori had caught her with a *girl*, but Jade hadn't pegged Tori for a homophobe. Still, Tori had lost her shit and she'd ended up leaving before things could escalate too far.

She'd been patient, staying with classmates and even a brief fling, but she was over it and she wanted Tori back. She wanted her *home* back and, even though Tori had never told her she wasn't welcome, she'd grown familiar enough with Tori's temper to know that staying away until she'd cooled off was the way to go.

There had to be more to the story, she knew it and she'd decided she wasn't leaving without answers.

There was a long silence before Tori sighed. "Fine, come up." 

Jade wasted no time in doing what she was told, unlocking the door with her key and making sure she locked it back before she went upstairs. 

Tori was sitting on her bed, scowling at the mess of snow that had started melting in the corner of the room. Jade sighed as she crossed the room, pulling the windows shut and locking them as she shivered. 

"Jesus, Vega, it's freezing in here. Are you *trying* to get sick?" she scolded as she dropped onto the bed beside her. 

Tori didn't answer, staring down at her hands nervously twisting in her lap.

Jade rolled her eyes. She hated talking about feelings and bullshit like that, but if this was the way Tori wanted to play it, she'd start it off. 

"I'm bi. Is that a problem for you?"

Tori jumped slightly, her eyes darting up to meet Jade's gaze for seconds before quickly going back to her lap. She swallowed and Jade frowned as she watched her closely. 

"Of course not," she mumbled at last, meeting Jade's gaze again at last. "I don't care who you love, Jade." 

"Obviously you do or you wouldn't have freaked out, Tori. I wouldn't be here if I really thought you had a problem with it, but there's something you're not telling me."

"I don't want to, Jade. Can't we just leave it at that? I'm sorry for freaking out, okay?" 

“No, we can’t,” Jade shook her head. “Look, Vega. After all the shit I did to you in high school, what the hell did I do to deserve this  _ now _ ? I thought we’d put this shit behind us.” 

“We did,” Tori sighed, shaking her head. “It’s nothing that you did, Jade. It’s me, okay? I’m the one who fucked up and I need to deal with it by myself.” 

“Fuck that, Tori. I’ve given you a  _ week  _ to deal with it. At least give me some idea about what’s going on in your head.  _ Please _ ,” she added, her tone both pleading and insistent. “Please just tell me what I did.” 

“You never told me you liked women,” Tori snapped, but there’s something in her eyes that tells Jade there’s more to it than that. 

“And what else, Tori? I know you haven’t been ignoring my calls for a week because I didn’t have a coming out heart-to-heart with you. You know me better than that.” 

“That is all,” Tori insisted weakly.

“Bullshit, Vega. Tell me the truth.”

“”Fine,” Tori groaned, burying her face in her hands and mumbling something that Jade couldn’t catch. 

“I can’t hear you, Tori.”

“I said, why don’t you want me?” Tori repeated, pinning Jade with a pleading stare. “Nobody ever wants me but I thought you were different. It was okay because you were straight and then suddenly you  _ weren’t  _ and you were fucking another girl in the living room and I wanted it to be me, okay?!” she blurts out in almost a single breath, turning red as soon as what she’d said registered. 

With a groan, she buried her face back in her hands while Jade blinked. 

Of all the scenarios she’d imagined, the idea that  _ Tori Vega  _ might like girls, might like  _ her  _ had never crossed her mind. 

But even shocked as she was, she couldn’t help but smile. “Tori, look at me,” she commanded, rolling her eyes when she shook her head and refused to budge. “Tori…” 

Taking off her gloves and tossing them to the side, she moved to kneel in front of Tori. Using both hands to gently pry Tori’s hands away from her face, she gently cupped her chin and guided her face up until their eyes met, their faces mere inches apart. 

Jade felt guilt threaten to overwhelm her at the pain and anxiety she saw swimming in their depths and suddenly, words just don’t feel like enough to reassure the terribly frightened girl in front of her.

Instead, she leaned forward and kissed her tenderly. 

Tensing at first, Tori soon melted into the kiss. Jade was careful to keep it soft, moving her lips against Tori’s as she tried to pour everything she couldn’t say into the kiss. 

When Tori tried to deepen the kiss, she forced herself to pull back. Resting her forehead against Tori’s as she panted softly, trying to catch her breath, she finally chances a glance up to see Tori’s eyes wide open, staring at her. 

“Jade…” 

“I’ve wanted you for years, Tori,” she sighed, standing up and sitting back on the bed beside her. Tori moved closer and she wrapped an arm around her, smiling softly when the Latina rested her head on her shoulder. “I think… I think that’s why I was so cruel to you in school. You made me realize I was bi and I was pissed about it for a long time.” 

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” Tori whispered. 

“I didn’t want to ruin the way things were once we moved here,” Jade explained with a heavy sigh. “We were finally friends, Vega. I didn’t want to fuck it up.” 

A moment of silence passed as they got lost in their thoughts. “Why didn’t you ever say anything to  _ me _ ?” Jade asked curiously.

“You’re going to laugh.”

“Just say it,” Jade smirked, tapping her nose and laughing when Tori huffed in annoyance. 

“Don’t do that!” she glared, sitting up and looking away from Jade. 

“Oh, come on, baby…” Jade damn near purred, instantly dissolving Tori’s anger. “Just tell me.”

“That is so unfair,” Tori groaned, shaking her head. “Fine. It was the same reason, okay? I didn’t think you liked women and…” She bit her lip. “I didn’t think you’d like  _ me  _ even if you did. That’s why I got so upset when I caught you with her in the living room. I didn’t care that she was a woman, Jade. Hell,  _ I’m  _ gay.” 

“You should have led with that,” Jade smirked, earning herself a smack on the shoulder as Tori fought back laughter. 

“We’re both idiots,” Tori groaned, rolling her eyes when Jade nodded in agreement. 

“Especially you,” Jade smirked, dodging her hand this time with a laugh. “I don’t get it, Vega. How could you think that I don’t want you?” she asked, growing serious. 

“Nobody’s ever wanted me around,” Tori sighed, glancing towards the window. “Not me-me, anyway. The Tori who could help people, sure, but Tori-Tori? No,” she shook her head. “I’ve never really let anyone see that Tori who didn’t leave… not until tonight.” 

“That’s why you tried to get me to drop it.” 

She nodded. “I was scared that you’d leave if I let you see the kind of person I really am. The one who could lose her temper badly enough to make you leave for a week and refuse to even answer your calls. It sounds stupid, but I was afraid that you wouldn’t come back at all and I didn’t want to make you leave again.” 

Listening intently, Jade nodded slowly as she absorbed the information. “I can’t promise that I won’t ever freak out and run, Tori. I get scared, I don’t know how to handle shit and I run. It’s how I am, how I’ve always been.” 

She shifted, turning slightly so that she could take Tori’s face in her palms, thumbs gently stroking her cheekbones as she looked her firmly in the eyes. “But what I can promise is that I’ll always come back.” 

Tori smiled, tears slowly sliding her face as Jade leaned in to kiss her. This time, neither held back and though both knew that things were far from okay and that they had a lot of work to do, for now, in this moment, they were together and that was enough. 


End file.
